What's your "change" strategy?
Understanding change as a process, trying to find balance can help you cope

It's often said that "people never change."

Research, in fact, shows that although some people seek out change, most of us resist it and are greatly unnerved by change that impacts our daily lives. That's because we are, by nature, creatures of habit, and keeping routines makes us feel safe and secure. Change can create a sense of loss, resulting in pain, sadness and even anxiety or depression.

So, even though you may among the majority of people in our society who say they "just don't like change," you need to be able to adjust - since changes both big and small are inevitable.

Here are some guidelines for coping with change, courtesy of our friends at ValueOptions, which administers Kellogg's Employee Assistance Program (EAP).

Help is just a phone call away If you feel that you need additional help dealing with change, ValueOptions is part of our Kellogg Benefits and is a great place to turn. Available to all Kellogg U.S. employees and retirees – and even members of your immediate family – who need assistance with a mental health or substance abuse problem, the ValueOptions can help with a wide variety of issues, including depression, stress or anxiety, grief, relationship problems, financial challenges, legal concerns and more. ValueOptions' confidential helpline is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. To talk to an experienced counselor, simply call the toll-free number: 1-800-997-4841. The counselor will assist you in getting the help you need. The ValueOptions network includes psychiatrists, psychologists, psychiatric nurses and master's-level counselors. They offer services at convenient times and locations. And you can be assured that confidentiality is a top EAP priority. Help is even available online. ValueOptions' Achieve Solutions website provides a wealth of information through timely articles, interactive quizzes, online courses, news stories and other resources.

The process of change

Making the transition from one set of circumstances to another takes time. You can't rush change. Deal with the experience moment by moment, and don't panic if it's difficult to imagine yourself too far down the road. Instead, think of change as a process:

• The ending - This stage involves either voluntarily or involuntarily ending an attachment to an old way of doing things, or a familiar person, place or thing.

• The transition - In this stage, people start to let go and move on. This stage can be easier if you know what to expect in the future.

• The beginning - In time, people take ownership of change. Once you've moved along in the transition, you'll begin to return to a sense of normalcy.

Fostering new beginnings

You can't force your acceptance of change, but you can make the process easier. These ideas may help:

• Expect a reaction to the change. Realize that it's normal to feel sad or angry. Let yourself grieve. Don't try to downplay your emotions. Avoid saying, "I don't know why this is affecting me this way."

• Find support. Seek out friends and family who can reassure you. You don't have to brave change alone. It often takes more courage to ask for help.

• Keep as many familiar routines as possible. Hanging on to some of your normal daily activities can help provide a sense of stability when the world around you seems chaotic.

• "Reframe" your thinking. The faster you're able to change your outlook about your situation, the easier it will be for you to adjust. Try to stay positive. Rather than viewing change as a threat, try to approach it with excitement and anticipation.

• Cultivate a positive view of yourself. Recall occasions when you successfully handled hardships in the past, and use those skills to meet your new challenge. Trust in your ability to solve problems and make the right decisions.

• Take it one step at a time. If you feel overwhelmed, try not to concentrate so much on the big picture. Think about how far you've progressed instead. Then break the transition period into manageable chunks - maybe even hours.

• Keep your imagination in check. Don't let "what if" thoughts get the best of you.

• Stay healthy. Coping with change or grief can be emotionally and physically exhausting. Make sure you take good care of yourself. Take breaks when you feel you need them, eat properly and exercise.

• Find the positive in the situation. Everyone has something good in her life. This may seem impossible to keep in mind, especially if you're coping with the death of a loved one, serious illness or other major life change. But remember that change makes us wiser and stronger.

• Remember that your struggle to deal with the change will end. In due time, your new circumstances will become familiar to you. Make a memorial to the change or loss if it will help you in your transition.

Trying to find balance and cope with change is a learned skill. You may find it difficult to adjust, but trust in life's renewable and sustainable potential.